It’s safe to say that I’m blowing the dust off of this blog. It’s gotten to the point where the paint has started to peel. The smell has become a little more like popcorn, and less like fresh plastic. The fresh, vibrant color has degraded into a little bit of a faded, indescribable mesh of gray and white that doesn’t seem to really go well with any other color. People have started to call it by its first name, without anymore honorifics. Its dog doesn’t really get excited to see it any more, aside from the few grunts and mindless following it does so that it can ensure it’s being fed dinner every night. It’s safe to say that OC (that’s what we in the blogging business like to do with all of our portals; acronym everything, even if OC makes you think of the television program ‘The OC’) is old. It’s the type of old that still gets the seat on the bus or train, though. It’s the type of old that it can give you a butterscotch candy, and you’ll actually put it in your pocket out of the gesture of kindness, instead of refusing. It’s the kind of old that when it invites you over to cook you some weird, southern style stew for breakfast on Sunday, you go, and end up teaching it how to use email.
It’s not really your grandmother kind of respected, but that kind of old lady that you see every once in a while respected. Well, now that old lady wants to put her dancing shoes on and strut into the movie theatre to see the 8pm showing of Breakfast at Tiffany’s that the alternative movie theater is playing on it’s retro night. AND IT’S GOING STAG. This is a big day for the OC. Today is the first that I’ve written for this blog in one hundred and thirty eight days.
I’d like to say that there’s come a time in my life where I can honestly just kick back and enjoy what it is that I have. Of course, as a consumer in the United States I am at a constant need to strive forward and achieve more than what I might be satisfied with- but I think I’m at a happy medium. No longer am I looking at myself, my home, my clothing, my food, my friends- and thinking how much I need to improve. No, I’d say those days are pretty much over. There might have been a period where I literally looked at everything with a pretty aggressive want to sigh.
You know exactly what I mean:
“[sigh] I’m tired of this shirt.” [wears shirt 3 times a week]
“[sigh] I’m so sick of this bar” [goes there every weekend]
“[sigh] If Liz calls about her fucking boyfriend again, I’m going to vom.” [answers Liz’ call]
I mean, a lot of us are still there- and a lot of us secretly like being there. It’s easy there- because once you achieve something that you actually know what you want- it’s kind of weird to figure out where to go next. Obviously, it’s not a good idea to backtrack- so you’re forced to move forward to tackle challenges that seem unrealistic. Whereas your focus was once to ‘land that dream job,’ or ‘find a solid pair of jeans,’ it’s spiraled into control to the point that your goals have actually become more akin to ‘finding a potential partner,’ or ‘investing.’ Ugh. I mean, we’ve been thinking about these things in much smaller scales for quite some time. Only recently has finding a partner been a replacement for ‘finding a hot girlfriend.’ It’s just that now that these issues are being taken so seriously, they are legitimately serious. Of course, with that seriousness, you get a foundation.
I’m not going to worry about how often I wear my shirt, because it isn’t serious or that important. If I like my shirt, I like my shirt, and I’m going to wear it. If I like my company, then who cares what bar I’m at? If Liz calls me twenty five times in a fucking half an hour, then I guess she needs me, and I’d rather spend my time helping my friends than watching something immortalized in my Netflix queue. So instead of sweating the small shit- I’m going to focus on the things that I like. That’s why I’m doing this- and why I’d like to share them all with whoever cares enough to read.
I’d like to welcome Origami Citizen back from it’s hiatus. While it’s no longer in the field, since it wants to get into consulting, it’s still relevant in some weird, money wasting way. Anyway, enjoy.
